Road Trip to Montreal

Ever since my mother’s brain injury last year, I’ve been visiting Boston more often to check in on her. Things are different and will never be the same. A fact of life I have to accept. Life is short and I want to take advantage of the time I have with my mother. I thought it would be nice to take her and my stepdad on a road trip, to change up their environment and do something new, especially since the last year has been challenging for them. For all of us really. A couple years prior, I took them on a road trip up the coast of Maine to Acadia National Park. This time, I contemplated where we should go next—Cape Cod, Rhode Island, Vermont? But my mother is not a nature or beach person. Then my stepdad mentioned Montreal and immediately, I thought YES YES YES.

My stepdad is from France and he speaks French. He had been talking about Montreal for awhile now and it totally slipped my mind. I had been a couple times in my early twenties, decades ago, but had only been in the winter. I had never been during warm, summer weather. Only a 5 hour drive from Boston, Montreal was a great choice. So of course after he suggested it, my Type A side went straight into planning mode.

We spent 3 nights at the Hotel Place D’Arms in old town, located diagonally across from the Notre Dame Basilica. This hotel was in a great location within walking distance of some great restaurants and historic sights. We arrived late afternoon and started our trip with cocktails on their Terrasse Rooftop. Then we walked to dinner in the downtown area at the most special spot, a restaurant named Toque. Twenty years ago, I first dined at Toque. This restaurant has survived over two decades, which includes a pandemic. I remember it being quite fancy and impressive even when I was young. It was nostalgic to get the opportunity to revisit so many years later with my parents. Even my younger sister dined there once before upon my suggestion years ago. I have a more refined palate now and also higher expectations. Did my 20 year old self know good food back then? Apparently, YES. Lol. Toque is French fine dining with excellent service, excellent cocktails, and excellent dishes that were delicate, indulgent, and beautifully plated. As an adult with my parents, I got the chance to order a variety of cocktails, appetizers, entrees, and dessert to share. When I was in my early twenties, I went with friends and I think we only ordered one main dish each. We were simple. Even though we didn’t get to sample very much back then, I still remember being impressed. I’m still impressed. My parents were impressed. It was the best way to celebrate our first night in Montreal.

On our second day, we walked through Rue St. Paul in old town near the port, which is basically a cute cobblestone street with souvenir shops and restaurants, and across Place Jacques Cartier where there are street performers and more shops. We had lunch in Chinatown, visited Atwater Marche, saw the canal, stopped at Rue Wellington. So many blog posts were suggesting Rue Wellington, including TimeOut Mag, which stated that Rue Wellington was one of the best streets in the world. I have to STRONGLY disagree. Rue Wellington is lame. Not worth your time. It’s a promenade of outdated stores, vintage shops (but not the cool kind), what looked like old furniture stores or shops from the 50s. There may be some cool resto bars but I was not impressed at all. I also was disappointed by the canals. When I talked to a local, he said that there are parts of the canals that look dingey but other areas that are nicer. However you really have to walk awhile to find the nicer spots. But it was too hot and we didn’t have the energy to do that. Atwater market was lovely though. Lots of fresh flowers, as well as produce, and little shops selling artisanal food products. I regret that I didn’t use this day to visit Mile End and Marche Jean Talon instead. Maybe that area would have been cooler than Rue Wellington, the canals, and Atwater Marche.

At night, we dined at Iberico Taverne e Tapas Espagnole in Mont Royal. Mont Royal was really cute. Another promenade but much better than Rue Wellington. Mont Royal was lively. Lots of people. Ice cream shops, restaurants, boutiques. Plus Ibericos was so delightful. Charming little Spanish tapas bar. All of the tapas were delish. I was disappointed with the seafood paella though. I didn’t think it was that good, but I enjoyed all the other dishes.

On our 3rd day, we visited the Botanical Gardens. It was about $15 USD for a ticket to get in. It was such a beautiful and peaceful way to spend a couple hours strolling. I loved the rose garden, the Chinese garden, and the Lily pad pond. They also have an herb and vegetable garden. Great area for photos too.

For lunch, we returned to Mont Royal and ate at L’Avenue. This came highly recommended on Tripadvisor though I’m not sure why. It played loud club music. We had to wait in line for almost 30 minutes. The dishes were gigantic and just a lot of food with not much flavor. I would not recommend this place either.

On our last night in Montreal, we dined at Monarque, within walking distance from our hotel. I believe it’s a newish French restaurant that has been open for less than a couple years. It has a fun, trendy vibe in the brasserie and a more formal dining room in the back. We enjoyed our appetizers and dessert. Our main dishes were good too but not the amazing-I-want-to-lick-my-plate type good. But in general, we enjoyed the food and the experience.

All in all, we had a great time in Montreal. Prior to going, I did so much research. But it still can be hard to decide what to do and where to dine when you visit a new city because articles and blogs all come from the experience of people who may not have your same preferences. I also read so much conflicting opinions in group forums and on TripAdvisor. For myself, I think I chose a couple bad options for lunch and day activities (Rue Wellington + L’Avenue). But you just never really know sometimes no matter how much research and planning you do. But I must say, all of our dinners were excellent, especially Toque.

So glad I got a chance to take my parents on a road-trip to Montreal. They would not have done it on their own otherwise. If you want to see all the yummy food I ate, you’ll have to check out my Instagram because there are too many to post here.

The Parents are in Town!

Since I moved back to Los Angeles after my two-year stint living in Hong Kong, my parents have not visited me and it has been almost a decade! This past Labor Day weekend, my mother and stepfather finally came to town, and everything that could go wrong went wrong. No running water, racist attack, and my car died in the middle of Hollywood—all within the first two days of their visit.

A water pipe on my street burst the night before my parents’ arrival and I had no running water for 20 hours! The workers from the LA Department of Water and Power were up all night attempting to fix the issue with no idea when the problem would be fixed. When my parents arrived the next day, I couldn’t bring them home after their long flight because we couldn’t use the toilet, wash our hands, or cook. It’s so easy to take for granted the luxury of running water! I took them to lunch at Din Tai Fung for Taiwanese food and then walked around Century City Mall. After a couple hours, we decided to come home with the game plan of walking to a nearby cafe to hang out when any of us needed to use the bathroom. When we got home, the water still was not fixed. My parents wanted to relax after their plane ride and did not want to have to go out again so we were all hesitant to hydrate. Fortunately after a couple more hours, the water came back on before we had to venture out to find a toilet! Hallelujah! Thank goodness I showered and washed my hair the night before.

On their first night in LA, I took them to one of my old favorite restaurants, Tar & Roses, in Santa Monica. I hadn’t been in 2 years and was excited to be able to share the experience with them. I don’t go out to eat that often anymore because I’m finding that the quality and service has changed a lot since the pandemic and I’m usually disappointed. Of course, it’s even more difficult to impress my parents. They are accustomed to delicious seafood in Boston. The restaurant scene in Boston is amazing, unpretentious, less expensive, and always reliable wherever you go. And the pandemic has not changed that. When I was there recently this past May, I found myself impressed by every single meal I ate out at a restaurant.

And then after dinner, we were victims of a verbal racist attack. As we walked back to my car on Santa Monica Blvd and 5th, a white man pulled at his eyes and yelled, “Hey, hey, you Ch*nk family!” Fortunately, my parents didn’t understand what happened. They didn’t understand what the man said or did. But I understood and my blood boiled. I yelled obscenities at him as he walked away. I explained what happened to my parents and they weren’t upset. Or maybe they were and just didn’t show it. They were probably used to internalizing it. But I don’t want this to be something anyone has to “get used to.” My parents survived a genocide and came to America as refugees searching for a better life and it seems like not much has changed since their early days in this country. My mother has already been through so much in this life and I was so upset that she had to experience racism in LA on her first night visiting me.

The incident was triggering. Made me think of the years of microaggressions and acts of racism that I have experienced my entire life. When someone makes you feel less than one day, sure, maybe you can shrug it off. But how about if someone makes you feel less than every day. Or maybe once a week, once a month. Then multiply that by every year you have lived. And now imagine it’s not just one person making you feel less than all those years. It’s someone at work. Someone at school. Someone at the grocery store. Someone off the street. It’s your neighbor. It’s someone in your friend group. It’s not one person you can avoid. Not one incident. It’s everywhere. Throughout different stages of your life. Happening again and again. What does that do to your mental health over time? What does that do to your sense of worth?

Going into the weekend, I was already feeling fragile with some other things going on in my life and also with everything happening in Afghanistan, which is a reminder of what happened to my parents in Cambodia with the genocide. It’s so sad and upsetting. During the early days of the pandemic, I went on walks often to get out of the house. Then I stopped when the violence against Asian Americans, and particularly the Asian elderly, increased. Only in the last couple months, I had been feeling comfortable enough to go on walks again and then this happened. It’s not something I could just easily shake off.

The next day, I took my parents for a Thai lunch at Hoy Ka in Hollywood. When we walked back to my car afterwards, my car wouldn’t start. I had to call for a tow truck and learned that my car battery was dead. Got a jump start and had to spend our afternoon at Pep Boys waiting to get my battery replaced. This was the 3rd thing that went wrong that weekend. I tried as hard as I could to put on a face so that I wouldn’t worry my parents, but the truth is, I felt so beaten down. I’m sure they noticed. I had no appetite. I couldn’t eat. When we came home, I saged the apartment. My mother superstitiously threw rice and salt over my balcony and did a short prayer with insence. Leading up to my parents’ visit, I had already been stressed for weeks with work and it had been on my mind all weekend. That next day, I collapsed onto my bed and napped for two hours. I never nap but I was so emotionally and mentally exhausted and my body couldn’t hold it in anymore. You can try to act like everything is okay, but your body doesn’t lie. Everything was not okay.

People say things happen in threes. That was it for us that weekend—the broken water pipe, the racist attack, and my dead car battery. We spent the rest of their time in LA cooking, eating, and visiting the Venice Canals and the beach. I’m glad my parents visited me but I’m sure it wasn’t the best trip for them. After I dropped them off at the airport, I felt a huge weight lifted from me. I no longer felt pressure to pretend that everything was okay. I felt like I could sort through all my complicated emotions and thoughts without having to fake it. I felt like I was finally allowed to be exhausted and not have to worry about how that was perceived or how it would affect anyone else.

That same week after much contemplation, I decided to part ways with a client. I realized it was not a good fit for me and it had been negatively affecting my mental health for weeks. Sometimes you have to walk away and let go of things that don’t serve you, as hard as it may be. When I made the decision, I came home and napped for two hours! The next day, I napped again. I’ve never napped so much in ONE week! My body was mentally and emotionally drained. And it took me about 5 days to recover. I am just starting to feel like myself again. I’m slowly coming back to life.

It’s ironic that my last post was about feeling good. As easily and quickly as things can go well, things can all come crashing down at once as well. You have to take the good with the bad. Things can change and turn around in a second. But all experiences are learning experiences and we can’t have one without the other.

I would love to add some new recipes to the blog soon. But for now, I need to take care of my mental health, listen to my body, and give myself a break. In the meantime, check out my Instagram for all the yummy food we ate during my parents’ visit!